Battered Blade
(New) (No Rust & Smudges) Conffesions Of The Wastlands 3 portrait
Battered Blade giving her Confession
Full Name Battered Blade
Race Unicorn
Sex Mare
Faction/Role Smile Squad Raiders (Formerly), Head of Battered's Bodyguards (currently)
Family Emerald Fields (adopted daughter)
Status Alive
Battered Blade is one of the main characters of the audio drama Confessions of a Wasteland Pony.

She tells her story in the pilot episode, The Ex-Raider.


Present Day

Battered Blade runs a bodyguard company called "Battered's Bodyguards," they chiefly operate in the city areas around Manehattan, getting ponies and other creatures through the Hellhound and raider dense parts of the wasteland. One of their most common routes is a Coastal Highway that hugs the cliff side south of Manehattan.

Battered first meets DJ Pony after escorting a mare to join her family members in Tenpony Tower. DJ Pony hears about her life through some mutual associates and is moved by her story, which she is very open about.

Hearing such a tale from an "everyday wastelander" sparks the idea to have a regular interview segment talking to other wastelanders to hear their own unique stories. Once the space was set up, he brought Battered in to star in first episode of Confessions of a Wasteland Pony.


Emerald and Battered Frame copy portrait

A framed photo, taken after the first Confessions episode

Battered Blade was born into a raider gang called "The Smile Squad" which occupied an area near Ponyville for a period of time.

She went through every form of abuse, including love-less apathy from her mother, until finally reaching a breaking point. One day, the current Smile Squad leader was looking for her while she was hiding in a tool shed. When he opened the door, Battered jumped from the top shelf and drove a jagged piece of metal through his leg. Now that he was pinned to the ground, Battered ran. As she ran, she noticed her cutie mark appear, which was a depiction of the metal driven through his leg. Taking that as a sign, she kept running and never looked back.

Battered scavenged for a time, finding food or supplies wherever she could. At one point she stumbled on an officer's sword and was then attacked by a mutant animal. Using the sword she was able to kill the mutant, but suffered some cuts on herself. Despite the wounds, she grew very skilled with the sword. Soon, the harshness of surviving the wasteland drove her to begin stealing from travelers. Once she got older, she began attacking and killing travelers too.

Years after setting up a home in an Opera House south of Manehattan, she attacked a caravan only to discover that they were a traveling family. The only survivor was an infant. The weight of what she had done, what her life had become, set in on her.

She raised the filly, Emerald Fields, as her own. Then she created Battered's Bodyguards to help save lives and try to pay off the debt of all the lives she destroyed.

Battered Blade would play a key role in many of the events to occur because of the Confessions interview series. Most notable of these would be her relationship with Diamondback, and the events involving The Red Reaper.


Offsite Art Wallpapers BATTERED portrait

Battered Blade providing color commentary during later interviews

  • "If my mother ever did have a life before the gang, she sure didn't bother to tell me about it... She was probably just like me, born to some filly taking her first steps into adulthood, which probably makes me a thoroughbred raider or something..."
  • "That’s the other thing about chems, they tend to melt your brain… Even once you’ve gone clean, you never really get that edge back…"
  • "But that is NOT what we do… We are NOT slavers. We are bodyguards who use our skills and experience to help ponies and get them safely through dangerous areas in the wasteland."
  • "When I was a filly, I was desperate. I used the sword because it was one of my first weapons, I had gotten good with it. But fighting that close is so dangerous. You can see how many cuts and scars I have from all those years. Cuts from my own blade, cuts from animal claws, cuts from whip lashes… Quite a few of these marks came from Smile Squad too…"

Behind The Scenes

  • She is voiced by IMShadow007, a long time actress with EAST Corp and singer on many Balefire Symphony songs.
  • Aside from SkyBolt, she is the longest running cast member of the series.
  • Battered's Bodyguards is loosely based on Reilly's Rangers from Fallout 3. This is further referenced in the forest green armor Battered wears.
  • After being absent during episodes 2-4, Battered Blade returned as a side character in episode 5, The Ranger. Aside from commenting on the main interviews, Battered had an extended opening story segment in episode 5 and episode 7 (The Mercenary). These segments follow a side story about the mysterious Red Reaper.
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.